My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 27

Good morning. It’s Monday. Ugh! But I have wonderful news. I went to the doctor yesterday to get my physical done for work and I lost 11 pounds. Yay for me. I only have to lose 20 more pounds to be where I used to be. I’m so excited. Yay!! I also have more wonderful news. I got a great night’s sleep and Friday I am coming to Winston to get the rest of my things. My mom has volunteered to use one of her vacation days to come up and help me. I couldn’t believe it. We’ll wait and see though. I’m just waiting for her to say she’s not going to do it after all or that she forgot. I’m still staying in the yellow when it comes to my mom. We did have a fight over the weekend, but I stood up to her and defended myself. She did apologize and says she was sorry and that was in the end of that. I’m so happy. I’m proud of myself. My weekend was wonderful. I got the rest I needed and my mom and I had a wonderful time together shopping for food and talking and stuff. I unpacked everything except my stuff for my desk. My mom and I are figuring out what to do about a table and how to get the desk from my sister Megan. I’m so excited. It was so wonderful. I made a lot of memories and I had a great weekend of nothing, but rest and relaxation. I read and just had a wonderful time. I forgot that this is what you do on the weekends. It’s so nice to have weekends off again. I did contact the Farmer Elementary school last week about the Head Custodian position and he’s going to start interviews in November. He contacted me this morning through email to tell me. I’m so excited. If I don’t get the job I’ll go onto the next jobs I have decided to contact. I’m so excited. God has been good. One day at a time I’m finding my way back through the darkness. My kids are being good. All my troublemakers except for one or two are not riding. Two of them got kicked off the bus. Thank God!! My bus was so quiet on Friday and this morning. Yay! I hope they stay off for good, but that’s just wishful thinking on my part. Oh well. Saturday I cooked a pizza and had a movie date. Sunday I relaxed and unpacked. It was just wonderful.

Well that’s all for now. I’ll keep you updated on everything especially the job stuff. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers and send me some good vibes this week. It’s only Monday and I want it to be Friday so I can move the rest of my stuff and get out of Winston. Yay!!

Have a great day and I love you!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

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My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 26

Good morning. I’m so glad it’s Friday. Thank God! Yay. I want to jump up and down, but I’m so tired I don’t have the energy to do so, but I think you get the point. I’m just so happy it’s Friday. It’s been a horrible week. It’s been a horrible four weeks.

I was backing up to try and pull in a spot at the high school yesterday and I hit a little trailer. There’s not much damage to the trailer or the bus, but my kids kept asking what I was going to do. I just told them to be quiet. My PTSD kicked in yesterday and I was just scared to death yesterday. I had to talk myself through it and I even cried a little because I just needed some release. Why am I telling you this because it’s helped me to make an important decision. I’ve decided to find another job. I’m going to make a list and start applying next week. I’m going to stay home this weekend. I’m tired and I don’t feel like going to Winston. I’m going to call Stacey and tell her I won’t be there tomorrow. She’s the lady that said someone was interested in my bed, my dresser, and my desk. If they aren’t then I’m calling Goodwill to come and pick it up.

I just want to say thank you to everyone who views my blog and follows me. I hope that you get something out of it and that it helps you in someway. I just want to be real, raw, open and honest. I hope you see that. More important I hope that you see Jesus Christ shine through and what he has helped me to overcome and I also hope you see that just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean my life is easy or that I get to take the easy way out in life because I don’t. I love you guys and I appreciate your viewing my blog and following me and supporting me. It means a lot.

So Saturday and Sunday are my restful days. I’m going to unpack, but I’m going to rest. Sunday is my sleep in/movie date with myself. I need to do something for myself this weekend. I’m excited about that. I’ve also decided to only blog during the week. I want the weekends for myself to rest. Once I get internet at the trailer I will blog on the weekends again. I need time to rest and recoup from the week. I’m tired and I need to do some self-care.

I love you guys and have a great day. I’ll see you guys back here on Monday. I’ll keep you updated on my job searching. Take care.

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 25

Good morning! I feel so good. I had long nap and it helped me to feel better. Oh man I’m much better than yesterday.

I got into an accident with my bus and I had kids on it. I didn’t get back to the school till almost 5 o’clock. I was heading to the other school to pick up my sixth graders and I was stopped waiting for the light to change and this guy was behind me and he was too close to the bus and he rear ended us. I had to call the Bus Garage and I waited. It was crazy. What a dumbass. Excuse my french you guys. He really was. The state trooper said there was no damage to the bus and he didn’t want to file a report. I asked the garage and Wendy came and talked with them. They kids and I are fine. They gave me the okay to leave and pick up my kids. I took everyone home and made everyone sit in their assigned seat. I’m going to do a new seating chart. Oh before I forget please don’t tell anyone about the accident I’m not supposed to post it about it, but you guys are my family and I trust you not to say anything. Thank you for letting me vent about it. I appreciate it.

This morning’s route was a blessing. All my troublemakers didn’t ride. It was wonderful. I am blessed. I am so glad. I actually got to the school on time and it was wonderful. I’m very grateful and happy. I am still thinking about the jobs. I found out yesterday that one of the day time custodians fell and hurt her knee and Pam am who is my boss will let me know what’s going to happen. It throws everything out of whack when someone is out, but it’s okay. It will be okay. I’m just glad Ty will be back tonight and he can do his own building. I feel funny about doing other people’s building because I do things a certain way and others do things their way and I don’t want to mess something up. But I’m just overthinking I’m sure. I just care about other people and I want to make sure that everything is okay for the next person.

Well that’s all for now. I’m still planning to go up Saturday to Winston and get everything else and then I can hand in the keys next week. I’m so glad. I’ve decided that if she asks me for the lease breaking fee I’m going to tell her that I don’t get paid till the end of the month and I will have to see. I’ll tell her that I’ll try to have it by the first, but it maybe the end of November before I have it. She’ll just have to accept that. If she doesn’t that too bad. I’ll do what I can. I just want this part of my life put behind me so I can move forward and get it on with it. Sunday is my sleep in day and watch movies and just relax. I’m tired and I need a weekend to relax and recuperate.

I love you guys and have a great day. Thanks for everything!!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

 

My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 24

Good morning! How are you guys?! I feel better now that I had some sleep. I took a nap waiting for the library to open. I’m just so ready for the weekend so I can sleep. So good news. My mom is all moved in. My sister and her husband moved the rest of my mom’s stuff for her and she’s all moved in. I’m so excited. Now all I have to do is go up Saturday to get the rest of my stuff and be done. I’ll hand in the keys before the end of the month. I’m so excited. I’m so excited to have this part of my life closed.

I’m debating jobs still. I have somethings in mind, but I’m just trying to chose wisely. I had a breakthrough on the bus this morning. Ryan is my biggest trouble maker. We actually had a conversation where he was yelling at me and he was actually trying to behave. He told me that he wants to go into the military. The army I think. I didn’t answer. I just listened. Something inside me started to break. My heart maybe I’m not sure. I hope he changes his mind. The military is not an easy life. It can be hard and boot camp is the worst. I’ve known people to go through this and it’s not easy. For now I will wish him well and I will just listen. The route is becoming easier and my kids well they’re kids. I’ll keep trying and going along till I decide what I want.

I love you guys and have a great day.

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 23

Good morning. This morning with the kids was much better. I’m getting the hang of the route and what the stops are. I’m getting to where I know some of the kids names and I’m figuring out who’s on and who isn’t so I don’t have to stop at their stop. I took a different route to work this morning to figure out if there was a shorter way to work. I think I have hit the jackpot. I have found a shorter route to work and I’m going to take it. I’m still staying in Archdale during the day. I’m considering other job items. I’m going to spend the weekends job searching.

It’s much colder here in Archdale and Asheboro. A lady at work told me it was going to be cooler. Oh man. It was cold this morning. It was like what the fudge happened here? It’s 70 degrees one day at four nine in the morning? I don’t get it. I like Fall and I like Fall weather, but still. It would be nice it was a slow decrease not a drastic change in the weather, but it is what it is. I’m cold that’s all I know.

Well that’s all for now. I hope you are doing well. Thanks for those who have just recently followed my blog. Thanks to everyone who follows my blogs. Please feel feel to comment with words of encouragement, advice, or things you have tried that you think would be helpful. I’m looking to step out of my comfort zone a little bit with my blog. I’m reaching out and reading others blogs and I really like it. So any help would be gratefully appreciated.

I love you and have a great day!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 21 & 22

Good morning. I’m going to include Sunday and Monday’s post together.

Sunday 10/15/2017

I slept in and I went up to Winston. My mom and I got my bed and everything went really well. We took a few other things and then we left. It took us two hours to get home because of all the construction they are doing to the road. Oh man. I fell asleep on the way home. My mom got us a snack and then we went home. She helped me with the bed to get it in the trailer and then she took the jeep back to my sister Megan’s place. My sister is awesome. She let us borrow the jeep and take it to Winston to get my bed. I’m so thankful. I have someone interested in the other twin bed that I have, my desk, and my dresser. I’m so excited. We’ll be calling me this week.

Saturday 10/14/2017

I forgot that I was supposed to tell you what happened. We got everything except the bed and the furniture in both cars. We made two trips and it took all days, but we got everything like I said except or the bed and the furniture. I’m so excited. My mom and I had a wonderful time together and we made a lot of memories. Some of the old feelings and instincts are still there, but I am keeping things in the yellow for now and thinking about things till I decide whether I want to trust her or not.

Monday 10/16/2017

So the power and the internet will be shut off today and I’m so glad. I’m ready for it to be done with. I have to call spectrum and ask them what to do with the modem. I’m probably going to keep it, but I’ll ask them. I called about getting tires for my car. It’s not going to be cheap. We are thinking of getting used ones, but I don’t think it will be cheap. I’m going unpack this week when I get up at four. I’ll take my time. I have a lot to go through and sort so I’ll do most of it on Saturdays and Sundays. During the week before I leave to go to work I’ll do the lighter stuff. I’m in Archdale during the day. It’s cold and rainy. I wish I had wore jeans. I will tomorrow. Anyway I’m tired. It’s amazing I was able to drive. I was half asleep. I didn’t sleep well. I don’t know why. Oh well. I’ll sleep good tonight. I tried taking one of the ways my mom suggested to go to work and it takes me four two minutes to get to work in the morning. I’ll take some other routes to see which one works for me. I’m still looking into other jobs. I’m thinking of calling about the head custodian job in Asheboro through the school system. I applied for the Wellness Consultant in High Point. I’m waiting to hear back on that one. My mom said there’s a temp service her work goes through and they need people. So I’m considering that too. I’m going to consider all my options. I’m just tired of commuting and I want to be able to get some sleep.

So that’s all for now. I’ll update you guys when there’s more news. I love you and have a great day!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: The Next Adventure Day 20

Good morning!! Of course as predicted I didn’t sleep well. But that’s okay. I’m so excited. Today is moving day. My mom is coming up today instead of tomorrow and we are starting the process of packing my boxes into her car and mine. I’m so excited. I truly am. I can’t wait to get out of here. I truly can’t.

Yesterday was nothing, but a big mess. The kids actually behaved themselves for the most part. I had two of them to start to fight, but the one kid was smart he moved. Then after I got off the bus that’s when the drama started. So I’ll explain. Earlier in the day I went to the library and I decided to do a go me fund to raise the money I need to pay the lease breaking fee to get out of my lease for my apartment. I don’t remember if I told you guys or not, but anyway I made the mistake and posted it on facebook. My stepmom or someone saw it and told my dad and he called my mom. My mom called me. So I had to tell her about the lease breaking fee and all that. I didn’t tell her because one I didn’t want to tell her and second I knew she would be upset and worried and I didn’t want to her to be upset or worried. I wanted to handle it on my own and try to figure out what to do. So I went off on her about him and got really mad. I went back to work and vented a little and cussed and cried and got all of it out of my system. I feel better, but I’m still mad at my dad. I wished he had just called me and told me he saw it and asked. I would have told him it’s none of his business and that I didn’t want to talk about it. But anyway. I understand his concern because I’m his daughter, but as I told Ty one of my coworkers last night that at some point he has to let me go and let me figure things out on my own. I’m 31 years old for god’s sake. I mean come one. Now I’m not dismissing his feelings or anything like that. I truly understand his side and see his concern, but I’m like still. I got myself into this mess it’s my responsibility to figure out what to do. I was asking for help like I should have and he just blows it out of portion. So I went on and deleted the campaign from facebook and when I got home last night I deleted the campaign from my go me fund profile. I’ll have to figure out something else so I can come up with the money. He ruined my whole day. I’m not going to talk to him for a couple of days until I’ve calmed down. It figures this would happen during the after my period. As I’ve gotten older the before and after parts of my period are the worst. It’s terrible, but anyway I’m fine now and I’m going to concentrate on the future and moving forward. My mom said that to me last night or something like it. I love it. I love that she said that. She brought some things last night and I was very blunt with her and made it clear to her what happened in those situations without their being a fight or me feeling guilty about things and that’s when she said about concentrating on the future and moving forward. I am so proud of myself for the growth I experienced yesterday.  I truly am. I am becoming a better person and I’m much stronger than before.

Today I’ll be spending most of it packing. Yesterday I set up my power and internet to be cut off on Monday. I will have my foods stamps transferred to Randolph County so I won’t lose them. I’m so happy about that. I can’t believe she said she could that. I was so excited. Yay!! I know it’s not much, but I’m so grateful. I can’t wait to move and get out of here. Yay!! My sister Megan texted and supposedly her and her boyfriend are playing it by ear to see if they are coming today to help move the furniture or not. It’s fine if they don’t. We can always do it another weekend. I thought about asking my ex Charles if he could do it instead. He doesn’t usually work weekends so and I thought maybe he had a truck. We’ll see. But if they don’t come today it’s okay. I can at least move some of boxes. I’m going to see what we can fit in our cars.

So that’s all for now. I’ll post sometime tomorrow and let you guys know how everything went. I’m going to sleep in tomorrow and rest. I’m so excited. Have a great day and a great weekend. I love you guys!!

Always in Love,

Kathleen