My Journey; My Path: My New Walk Day 47

Good morning! I feel great. I got seven hours of good sleep. I’m so excited and happy. I am just glad it’s Friday. I’m really happy. Yay!! It’s going to warm again and I’m so excited. I’m wearing a special outfit today to make myself feel good and feel special. I love Fridays because I can wear jeans. I have these really cute capri jeans that I bought a couple of years ago. They are cute and then I have my favorite tank top and a flower top that I got while I lived in Winston. I used to wear it sometimes when I was a Lead when I worked at Goodwill. I’m so excited. I’m not looking forward to my route, but I’m just going push through and pray because it’s Friday and I can enjoy a nice restful/peaceful weekend. I hope to see my sister. Megan is needing some help on the computer. So I’m going to text her today and see if she wants me to come by tomorrow and help her. I can’t believe tomorrow is Saturday already. I’m so excited. This week really went by quick and I’m glad. I truly am. Payday is still 4 days away, but I’m happy. I am just so happy. Thanks for the continued love, support, and encouragement that I receive from you guys everyday. It means so much to me.

Today’s agenda: I am going to work, then go to the gym, go back to work to drive the afternoon bus, and then I will go home and spend time with my mom. I’ll make myself something to eat and we’ll watch Sherlock Holmes with Jeremy Brett. It always makes me feel better. Then I’ll surf the internet more than likely and I’ll make plans to see Megan tomorrow if she’s up to visitors. She was tired from her visit to the doctor yesterday so I want to make sure she’s up for visitors and stuff. I hope she is. I can’t wait to see her again. I miss her so much. I truly hope this transfer thing happens. I have a backup plan if it doesn’t, but one thing I do know is this: I am happy and that GOD is in control.

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here tomorrow. I love you!!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

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My Journey; My Path: My New Walk Day 46

Good evening! It’s a long story, but I did my afternoon route yesterday and ended up messing up someone else’s yard and they weren’t happy. I apologized and explained what the county was having me to do and all. He didn’t seem to care. I ended up calling Valerie and telling what I was going to do instead of backing up my bus I was going to pull in and then back up. Well I had the most awful nightmares about what happened and about crashing the bus and all so I didn’t sleep well. By one or one thirty this morning I gave up and decided to call in sick. I texted my boss Mrs. Vest and told her I couldn’t come in. I do feel bad that I said I had the stomach bug, but my stomach was upset. I went back to bed and rested. I did nothing today, but surf the internet, wash dishes, go outside for walks, and now I’m spending with my mom. Megan’s appointment today went really well. The doctor helped her a lot and he gave her a natural treatment to start instead. He made other suggestions as well. Apparently the doctor she is seeing has had Lyme Disease so he knows exactly what she’s going through. I’m just glad that everything worked out. My mom and I will head back tomorrow. I already texted Mrs. Vest and told her I would be coming back. I told her thank you for finding me a driver for my bus at the last minute. I wanted to wait and update you until now just in case someone should question why I’m blogging when I’m sick? Not that it makes any difference, but I like to be careful about those things and be considerate of that. I don’t want to lose my job. I’m going to go in tomorrow and I’m going to do what I suggested to Valerie and try it. I think it will work. I’m going to go to bed early and rest. I’m going to pray and do my devotional and put my trust in the Lord and that he will take care of me until I can transfer or find another job. In other news I’ve asked out a fellow co-worker. I like him a lot. We’ll try to do something next week. I’ll let you know what happens with that and what happens with my route tomorrow in Saturday’s blog post.

I love you and thank you for continued love, support, and encouragement. Have a great evening!!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: My New Walk Day 45

Good morning! I didn’t sleep well, but I feel good. I’ll be tired by the end of the day, but that’s okay. I feel good. I’m going to the gym today so that will help me as well.

Just wanted to give a quick shout out to everyone who reached out to me yesterday. Thank you so much for your support and reminders of God’s love and his control. God is in control. I’m so grateful and thankful for all that he’s done for me.

Yesterday was a good day. It was busy. The morning route went well, but the afternoon route was a little rough. I just have to get used to my new turnaround. But God was with me and I’m so grateful. I’m just glad it went by so quick. My mom went to Megan’s to visit.  She started her new medicine and that didn’t go well. She got sick. The doctor wants to see Thursday. My mom is going to go with her. Poor Megan. She just can’t catch a break. I’m going to go on Friday and visit. Hopefully she’ll feel better enough by then. I’m going to step up my prayers for her. She needs them. She truly does. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers.

Well that’s all for now. I haven’t heard anything more about my transfer or not. I’m hoping to get on the list and get out of ATMS by June so I can start the summer at SERMS. I don’t want to work with Pam over the summer. It’s going to be a nightmare trying to work with her especially since she’s not doing anything. But she’ll have to because there will be adminster’s there at least sometimes anyway so she’ll have to, but that’s no longer my concern. I don’t worry about it anymore. She’s in the hands of the Lord and I do what I do for the Lord not for anyone else. Once I realized that I needed to do what I do for the Lord I no longer cared what she does. It annoys me. Sure it does, but I just let it to God. I’m not always good at that. I’m just grateful for another day that the Lord gives me to try once again.

Well I’ll talk to you soon. I love you and have a great day!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: My New Walk Day 44

Good morning! How’s everyone doing? I’m doing well. I got to bed early and I got seven hours. I’m so excited. I have a little bit of a headache, but I feel good. My mom got home and she cooked. I did eat a little, but I got to spend some time with her before I went to bed. She also brought home food from Megan’s. I told her I’m going to go over and see Megan on Friday. I just know with my schedule I won’t be able to go over there and spent time with her and then try to go home and go to bed. I know spending time with her is important, but I also need to rest. I did go to the gym and I had a great time. I always do. I’ll tell you more about that on Sunday. I’m resting today. I’m not going to the gym today. I told my mom last night I’ll be happy when I can transfer because I’m tired of hearing that the nigh shift doesn’t do anything. Cheryl is my other coworker and she works on the gym at my school. She cleans it and such and she continually complains that no one does anything. I keep telling he she needs to talk to Mr. H and she says she will, but she won’t. I almost said something to Mr. H yesterday about because I’m tired of hearing about it, but I didn’t. It’s not my battle to fight. I’ve accepted that no one is going to work, but I can’t stop doing my job. I have to do what I’m doing and I’m not doing it to get praise. I’m doing it for the Lord and that has changed everything for me. I’m doing it because I want to do a good job and I want to do it right. I’m doing it because I want to help others. My help is very much appreciated. I don’t need to hear that everyday. Just once in a while is fine. I know that everyone appreciates me. Do I have a connection with everyone at school? No of course I don’t. I can’t. It’s impossible. There are so much teachers and so many students, but God has put the people he wants me to bless right in my path and those are the ones I talk to and even some of the others one reach out to me. Being nice and kind to others and being respectful to them does pay off in the end. I’ve had teachers who don’t normally speak to me start speaking to me. It’s awesome. I’ve treasured those moments because they are rare. I speak to students. I try to make them feel important. I was doing bathroom checks yesterday and a young girl was upset about her necklace. Another kid broke it off, but she was still upset. I told her to see if she could get permission to go to the office to talk to a counselor about it. She said okay and she left. Did she go? I don’t know, but the point was that I helped her. I listened to her. I made her feel valued and important. I made her feel that in the moment she was the most important person in the world. I have the power to do that. My sister mentioned something about that when I was there Sunday to see her. I was hugging her when I left and she told Jeff she couldn’t wait to get a “Kate hug” because I made her feel like the most important person in the world. Well of course I did. She’s my sister. She is the most important person in the world to me next to my mom and my oldest sister Christa and my dad of course. I want other to feel that they aren’t alone. I have felt alone for so many years. I had wonderful people that I surrounded myself with and they have helped me to not feel so alone in the world. They are my rock in times of trouble and stick with me and pray for me. They encourage and support me and often give me the advice I need to help me be the best me possible.

Well that’s all for now. I hope today will be a quieter day. We’ll see. Have a great day and I love you. Thank you to all of my family here on WordPress. You are the ones that I was talking about above. You have helped me to feel that I’m not so alone in the world, you’re my rock in times of trouble and have stuck with me and prayed for me. You’ve encouraged and supported me and often you give me the advice I need to help me be the best me possible. I wouldn’t be here without you and neither would my blog. So thank you. I have three and 25 followers now and I thank God for each and everyone of you.

Always in Love,

Kathleen

My Journey; My Path: My New Walk Day 43

Good evening everyone. I hope you had a wonderful day. I had a wonderful day. I had a rough morning so I didn’t post until now. I didn’t sleep very well last night so I slept in and decided I would update you right now.

I had a wonderful day. I had a rough morning with my route. The guy that called and complained to the county about backing up in his driveway came and made stop my bus and talked to me. He wasn’t very nice. He wasn’t like really rude, but it really rubbed me the wrong way. So I called Valerie my boss and told her what happened. So this afternoon we tried the new turnaround on my route and I think it’s going to work just fine. We’re going to get some gravel to put down, but everything should work just fine. I’m so excited. I am so relieved because I hate going down there and trying to backup a bus in between a light pole and a tree. It was scary. It really was. Well now everything is resolved I’m so grateful.

I had a great weekend. Saturday I spent the day at home taking care of stuff. I didn’t get to see Megan after all, but I went over on Sunday to see her. Saturday was a great day for me, but my depression decided to kick in. I wrote a post about it. It’s called Something Special Happened. Please read it and I hope it will inspire you to keep moving forward even on the shitty days. Sunday was a rough day for me. I had a huge headache that wouldn’t go away. I had to keep taking medicine and I drank a lot of water, but that didn’t really help. It’s probably why I didn’t sleep well. I ended up having to take another dosage of medicine this morning to get rid of it.I finally did though. It finally stopped today thank God. But other than that I had a great day Sunday. I got to see my sister Megan and do some other stuff I needed to do. I enjoyed visiting with Megan. I always do. My mom and I had a nice open and honest conversation about her family and her family history. I learned things I never knew before and I was very excited to learn. I’m glad she opened up to me. It made me feel good. It made me feel special. So overall my weekend was great. I wish it had been a little more relaxing, but that’s okay. There’s always another weekend.

Today was a wonderful day as I mentioned and I’m home now. My mom is at Megan’s helping her cook. I’m going to go over on Friday to visit her and then go back over on Saturday to help her with some stuff she needs done. I just know that this week will be rough so I won’t be able to go over until Friday. I also want to make a better effort to get to bed earlier than eight pm. I need seven hours and last night was awful. I don’t want to go through that again. So tonight I will make a better effort to get to bed.

Well that’s all for now. I will update you guys tomorrow for sure. I love you and God bless. Have a great evening!!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

Exercise journal and other details…

Good morning. It’s so beautiful here. The sun is shining. I just wish I could get rid of this headache. Oh well. So onto my time at the gym. I told you guys in the weekly posts that I made some changes to stuff so today I’m going to tell you about them. So here goes.

I have a bullet journal that I started an Exercise Journal. I write the days I go to the gym and I write what I do and how many calories I burn and I feel after each workout.

I’ve decided to workout four days a week. So I’ll work out on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I’ll workout for thirty minutes and on Saturday I will work out for an hour. I’ve been trying the different machines and I found one that I really like. It’s a walking machine where you are basically walking up a set of stairs. I found I burn a lot more calories than I would on the treadmill. I still like the treadmill so I will do that on Saturday. I tried some other machines like the bicycle, but I don’t like it. There are some other machines, but I’m not really interested in trying them.

I’ve also decided to take measurements and compare each week to see how much I’m losing. I’m going to have my mom help me with the measurements. I’m also going to challenge myself to get on the scale and see how much I weigh. I’m going to weigh in on Sundays. I think Sunday is a good day. I burned a total of 951 calories this week. I’m very excited about this. I pigged out yesterday and I went to the gym for an hour. It was hard, but I felt so good afterward. I felt like I had more energy and I felt great, I felt awesome. It was wonderful. Planet Fitness makes it really easy to workout and I don’t feel judgement. I don’t feel like someone is looking at me saying hey look at her she’s fat or whatever. I feel really great. I even treated myself to  the hydromassage bed after my workout yesterday and I’m glad I did. It felt great.

Goals: I’m going to share with you guys each week about the measurements and how many calories I’m burning. I’m also going to do a monthly weigh in where I see how much I weigh each month and adjust my goals and just check in with how I’m doing and feeling stuff.  I think it’s important.

My goals for this week are: I’m going to work on not eating out and trying to eat something during the day so I’m not starving when I get home. I think burning calories and stuff like that is great, but I also need to watch what I eat because I won’t lose any weight if I don’t watch what I eat. I know that I really like chicken and stuff, but I need to eat more veggies and fruits. I want to make smoothies so I think I’ll start doing that. I really like smoothies and I think that would be a great way for me to have something during the day to eat so I’m not starving when I get home. I’m debating on whether to count calories or not. I think that if I do that it would help me, but I’m just not sure so I’m going to think about it and then decide if I think that’s best for me. I think have some really good goals for myself at the moment so I’m going to concentrate on them for the present.

I just want to give a big shout out to everyone who has reached out to me and has encouraged, supported, and loved me through this whole process. I still can’t believe I actually joined a gym and I’m working out. I never would have done this, but sometimes you just have to look at yourself and say hey you need to do something for you. You need to do what’s best for you. No one else can do it for you. You have to do it. I’m very excited. I think mom is just like what? I can’t believe she’s joined a gym and so on. I tend to say things, but never act on them and I think I’ve proven to her and to myself more than anything that I am a woman of my word. So thank you to everyone!! I truly appreciate you more than I can say.

So I’ll check in with you guys next Sunday and let you know about my time at the gym for this upcoming week.

Any advice, tips, and so on are welcome and appreciated. I actually had a fellow blogger give me advice about working out three/four days a week and I’m glad I listened because that ended up being what was best for me. So please know that I will listen and I will take your advice or tips seriously and that I will decide whether it is what’s best for me. So please feel free to leave any advice, tips, and so on in the comment box below.

I love you and have a great day!

Always in Love,

Kathleen

 

Something Special Happened

Something special has just happened. I have to share with you.

Most of you may not know this, but I don’t know if I actually shared this with you, but today I chose to share this with all of you. I hope it will help you. I hope it will inspire and motivate you.

I suffer from depression. I began my journey with depression in 2011 after losing my Uncle Bucky. It really hit me hard and I was also dealing with a lot of stress and drama at my workplace where I worked at at the time. I took my medicine for a while and it helped for a while. Then it stopped helping so I took myself off of it and tried natural ways like taking vitamins and I tried other things as well. Nothing worked. Nothing helped. So in 2013 or 2014 I decided to get up everyday and fight my depression head on without any medicine or anything. So for about four or five years I’ve fought depression without any medicine or anything at all. I get up everyday decide to be the best version of myself as possible. I have really bad bouts. I had some in college when I was studying Massage Therapy and the more I talked about it the more it helped me. I had a really bad bout when I worked at Goodwill in Winston-Salem that last a week or two. I have some that last for days. But today was the first time in a long time that since I moved back to Asheboro that I started to feel depressed. I tried to listen to music and just keep going and ignore it, but it all came to a head and bursted like a bubble and I started to cry. I played a song called Rise by Danny Gokey. It’s one of my favorite songs. I love it. I immediately started to cry and I immediately fell on my knees and started to pray. I prayed for my mom and my sister Megan. Megan as you know has been diagnosed with Lyme Disease and I’ve been helping her as much as I can. I thought about her as I was praying and crying and I decided to get up and keep moving. She is truly an inspiring woman. I love her. Even on days like today she still inspires me. I am so thankful for her. I thank God for her and what an inspiration she is. She motivated me to keep going. I feel better now and I feel like I can keep going that I can keep moving forward with my day. I feel better. Megan: I love you. I truly do. Thank you!

Thank you for letting me share this with you. Thank you for allowing me to bare my soul with you and share this beautiful thing that has happened.

Always in Love,

Kathleen